Tuesday, September 11, 2007

The Silver Saga Starting Out


Hola!

"What?!? Who's there?"

It is I, Arkali!

"Well, who are you and where are you?"

Hmmm. I'm your controller.

"I don't need a controller."

Sure you do! Don't you want somebody with you, looking out for you? Think of us as a team. And this is a challenge, so you'll appreciate the help.

"I don't understand..."

Well, of course you don't. You're a sim. I'm your controller, mouse-mistress, call me what you will. I don't have complete control - some things are outside my influence. But I see the big picture, and I want what's best for you. Comprende?

"I... I guess."

Oh - and another thing - people will be watching what you do. Why don't you say hi to everyone?

"Watching!?! Eep!"




"Hi!"
whisper: "What now?"

Just smile and wave while I introduce you.

"Greetings, everyone! This is Sapphire Silver..."

"Sapphire Silver? Tell me you didn't!"

Shush. Don't interupt. It's called a theme.

:snort:

That's not very lady-like.

"As I was saying, this is Sapphire Silver. She's an adult, a family sim, and she's making an extreme start."

"What's an extreme start? And can I stop smiling and waving?"

Yeah. And an extreme start means you're what they call land poor right now.

"Simlish, please?"

You've got a lot of land, but you're practically broke.


In fact, this is all you can afford right now.

"You've got to be kidding! You said you'd look out for me..."

Stop whining. It's unbecoming. And I am looking out for you. This isn't permanent. Oh!! Quick! Go say hi to the paper-boy.

"Why?"

Just do it! I'll explain in a moment.


See, you have these goals, and if we satisfy your goals, you get points that we can spend on special prizes. Don't you want to win prizes?

"Yeah. But how do I know what the goals are?"

You don't. I do. Remember how I said we were a team?

"Yeah."

So - you ready to do this?

"Yeah!"



This is the welcome wagon. I don't really see anybody to hook you up with.

"What do you mean?"

We're husband hunting.

"Malcolm Landgraab is cute."

Yeah, but we don't want him.

"Why not?"

Because he's business poor. He's not got much ready cash, and we need some cash.

"Ah. Okay."



Hsst.

What?

"Who is that lady, and why won't she leave?"

I dunno. Let's throw her out.

"Thank god."



"Have I mentioned I'm sick of instant drinks?"

That's all we've got until we get enough money to buy something for you to cook on/with.

"Well, make it soon, please. These things taste like a tin can."

I know. Gross, huh?


"Hey!!! Do you mind?!?!"

Oops! Sorry!



First day on the job?

"Yeah." *gulp*

Don't worry - you'll do fine!




So, why are you so blue, kitty cat?

"I'm not blue, I'm red, you stupid biped."

Well! Excuse me! So, why are you red?

"Well, my two biggest problems are having to sleep on the ground and not having anything to sharpen my claws on."

Well, if you're good at work I'll work on that, okay?

"Whatever."

Geez. Cat with a 'tude!

"Lady, we all have 'tudes. It's part of our job description."


So, what do you think of this guy? I think he's got money. Lots of it.

"Eh. His lip has a weird quirk."

Okay. We can keep looking.



See, I told you I'd fix you up.

"Thanks! I'm feeling much better."

So, you're up for learning how to shake hands?



"I suppose. God, how humiliating."

"Why are we doing this?"

Fame and fortune! Just trust me, you two.



An aside: How the hell do the bills work out to be $78?? We're not talking posh, here.



"Omigawd, these trees are so cool!"

I know. We "bought" these with goal points.

"Really? What else can we buy?"

Lots of stuff. But you see now why it's important?




Ooooh! Say yes!

"I don't feel like going out."

Go anyway. We can look for a husband AND you can eat solid food.

"Done!"


Slim pickin's on the husband front.

"Yeah. Ick."

But at least you're getting solid food.

"There is that..."



Another aside: How the hell did this happen? I don't even think there were 9 people in the group. What the heck?



Okay, what do you think of him?

"Eeeww. He's got old man hair."

Hair we can change.

"I still don't like him."

Grrrr.



"But this Chico guy is cute."

Last resort. NPCs first.



"No comment."

Me, either.



"Ooooh!!! You got me a stove!"

Well, kinda. I have plans for the stove.


"Wait - why am I burning my dinner?"

Firemen are hot. It'll work out.




"It better. This sucks!"



"And I'm tired. So the fireman was a firechick. What next?"


"Why do you want me with a woman?"

I don't. I swear I ordered pizza from the guy.

"Yeah, right."

Let's try the bar-tender again.



"I told you, I don't like him."

He's got black hair - that's one of your turn-ons!

"I don't care - I don't like him."



"And he doesn't like me. Now, are you happy?"

I guess.


"This is infuriating."

I know, but we just pulled out the big guns. This next guy is a sure thing. EVERYBODY loves him.

"We'll see."


3 comments:

Anjel76 said...

This is pretty funny! Wow ... you are going REALLY extreme with having a pet. :O) And we can here him/her talking, too! *grin* Wow ... She is REALLY picky when it comes to guys. I can relate. :O))

Kethwyn said...

Hee! *claps hands* Oh, I like Sapphire. She's funny and she's got 'tude. Hopefully she doesn't give you as much flak as I get from mine though. And Kitty has 'tude too (but then all cats do *grin*) Did Kitty tell us their name or did I miss it? It's too bad Sapphire doesn't like Bartender Boy; he's got potential. Hopefully the next fellow you have lined up for her meets her high standards ;)

Sally said...

I just discovered your blog and love it. This was hilarious! I'm off to read the next chapter...